ijebuman's diary

The colour handling and shading give a sense of overall form. There is a consistency, a coherence, a style that carries through. A refined eye guiding the brush. There are no successful accidents here. The results achieved are intentional and sure....

Don't be alarmed, this is just the sort of 'pretentious posturing' that occurs when you're presented with your son's first painting lol ; - )

Labels: junior

Just realised how long its been since i blogged about ijebuman jr, he is now 11 months old (amazing how time flies)

Just like Gordon Brown's cabinet reshuffle, we did a furniture reshuffle at ijebuman's mansion this week ; - )
With junior crawling around we've suddenly realised how child unfriendly the place is. The little rascal has developed an unhealthy relationship with everything apart from his toys. He has started chewing on wires, knocking over plants and generally messing up the feng shui arrangement of the place (we ijebu's too get our own feng shui LOL).
No wonder my sister in law was laughing at us last year when we were renovating the house.
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Weapon of Choice

London is gradually turning into some knife crazed city, with kids running around stabbing each other. Since the beginning of the year over a dozen teenagers have been fatally stabbed.

According to The Times
Worried parents are buying body armour for their children in an attempt to keep them safe from street violence.
A firm that supplies stab- and bullet-proof vests to government agencies around the world has sold 60 jackets to concerned parents after several murders of teenagers on London streets.
“They are concerned by what is happening on the streets — the level of violence. A 13-year-old girl has been our youngest customer but most are about 15 or 16. Most of the calls have been from London" a spokesman for the firm is reported as saying.

check out the stats
10% of boys aged 11 and 12 are reported to have carried a knife or other weapon and 8% said they had attacked someone intending serious harm. By the age of 16, the figure had risen to 24% who have carried a knife and 16% who had attacked somebody intending harm.

Links
Boy stabbed to death because he looked at youth ‘the wrong way’
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article1996525.ece

Teenager stabbed in third fatal attack since weekend
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article1990729.ece

Call for security checks as one in four pupils admits to being armed
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/article462529.ece

If things carry on this way Jr might end up in a boarding school in good ole Naija.

Labels: junior

Yeah its been 6 months since i took on the 'responsibility' of taking care of another human being (i.e my son; Ijebuman jr). I promised myself that i wasn't going to be one of those parents who goes around showing off pictures of their kids but i just can't help myself LOL

I have to admit that i wasn't too "keen" on having kids. Mrs ijebuman was well aware of this but took a "risk" and still hooked up with me, hoping she could change my mind somewhere down the line. I eventually gave in because of the whole 'biological clock thing' and the 'hints' i was getting in bed ; - )
The whole idea of getting married and then having kids not too long afterwards, just never appealed to me. I do love kids but i think everyone has a certain time in their lives when they want them and age has nothing to do with it.. (and science has managed to solve the whole 'biological clock thing' as i was reading somewhere about a 67 year old woman having kids)

But i digress
That was an era i'll like to call BIA (before I-j Arrived). In the current era (AIA) our lives revolve around the whims of I-j.
Not that i'm complaining about anything especially now that he is out of our bed : - ) (see co-sleeping)

Becoming a father has been fun and sometimes it has been overwhelming, like the other day when i had just settled down to watch my favourite show on tv, prison break.
I-j quickly realising that he was not getting my full attention, decided to put on a show of his own, unfortunately wifey was not around so there was no escape this time..
It constantly amazes me the amount of noise a baby can make, I-j could hardly make a sound when he was born, now he can literally bring the house down when he "cries"

So I-j starts crying (actually he is screaming) and i'm wondering to myself what the neighbours must be thinking (probably, what in the world is he doing to that kid ??) i know he is not hungry as i had just fed him, it's not heartburn, i had checked his nappy and he wasn't sleepy.
I had checked all the obvious things and yet he wouldn't stop crying

and then his mum returns and he is all 'smiles' as if nothing happened.

its official he is a "mummy's boy" how can i ever compete against that...
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vamos ir a españa

which could obviously mean something else but i hope it means 'we're off to spain'.
We're taking a tour around the south of spain from malaga to algeciras and hopefully to morocco if we have enough time.

Labels: junior

As first time parents, wifey and i are learning on the job, as regards to raising a child. Somewhere along the way it seems we've allowed Jr to determine the 'rules of engagement'. A few weeks ago, after a couple of sleepless nights in his moses basket, we sort of gave in and allowed him to sleep in our bed.
He has not left since then..

Labels: junior

Naija person dey suffer for this town, sometimes i just feel pissed off at the way every naija has to carry the can for all the fraudulent activities of a small number of our citizens. Its not as if i can change my name from ijebuman to blackburn man, besides i'll die first before i 'anglicise' my name.

Anyway i sent off Jr's UK passport application to the passport office, Since its his first pali (unfortunately he can only get the green one when he is 5), it has to be signed by a signatory who is a british citizen. I got my good pal O, whom i have known for over 20 years to sign it. I get plenty britico/naija friends but i knew O is like me and will not take crap from anyone if they decide to be 'funny'.
My peeps, as naija you have to be extra prepared, UK immigration authorities seem to have decided to apply different 'rules' when dealing with "all" nigerians. (lets not fool ourselves, we're all bloody 'foreigners', all those 'naija coconuts' out there just wait till the BNP gets into power ).

Anyway, i wasn't too surprised when O called to tell me he was sent a letter at work from the passport office, asking him "further questions" about my son's application. They wanted O to respond to the "further questions" on business headed paper.
We both laughed, abi wetin person go do now. O na investment banker and trust me he has to deal with a lot more 'shit' about naija than me, anyway he called them up and asked them to clarify the "business headed paper" part as he is shocked that they actually expect him to use his employer's stationery to respond to a personal matter. So O told them no way and of course the person he spoke to now said "it wasn't really necessary" and that plain paper will do.

I hate bullshit they should just come out and tell us these things. You know these "people" rather than come out and say the truth that they think all 'naija peeps' are fraudulent and can't be trusted, they try to use 'agbari'..
Or maybe i'm just having a bad day and being paranoid, and this 'policy' actually applies to everyone and not just naijas.
Somehow i doubt it, i've been in this town long enough to smell bullshit a mile away.
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Whats de Koko??
Ok i'm ashamed to admit it but hey what the heck, i absolutely love that d'banj remix video/song tongolo it has finally toppled my other favourite youtube naija video/song i go chop your dollar
Wifey absolutely hates the song and she's not too happy that Jr is been exposed to such lyrics. Like i care, when she is 'exposing' him to her "jesu feran mi" naija music, i don't complain now, abeg if we wan 'hear about 'dekoko' let nobody spoil our fun jo.

Naija music is going through a major renaissance, with artists like Lagbaja leading the way. And the videos too are just getting better, Lagbaja's Never far away has to be one of the best.

meanwhile..
stumbled on this video by a guy called biglo (is this guy for real ???)

Labels: junior

its been a while since i blogged about Jr, so here's a quick recap. He's now over 3 months old, i do not find his smile fascinating anymore (joking of course), the little trickster uses it to manipulate us ; ), all he has to do is smile and he knows he'll get his way. (damn he's a fast learner, took years for me to learn how to manipulate people).

I'm constantly fascinated about the way he is changing daily, its sort of like a biology lesson, the other day i suddenly realised that his hearing has improved to the extent where he is now able to identify individual sounds from the background noise, my mobile rang and he was extremely startled by the ring tone. We had to turn off the ringer on the phone in the bedroom as he now wakes up every time someone calls.

He is also going through what i like to call the 'drool stage'. Apparently babies start drooling a lot when they are about to grow teeth. I had read about it somewhere but i still wasn't prepared for the amount of drool, lets just say my shirt goes through another 'wash' anytime i'm with him.
Like wifey will say its all part of the 'joys of fatherhood'. Yeah right, but she didn't find it funny when he 'peed' all over her and i said its part of the joys of motherhood..

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IBB spam mail

As if i don't get enough spam, some troll had to send me this:

OSILAMA ISABEMOH [MALIK_ISA@yahoo.com]
reply-to JOOLOWO@yahoo.ie
to ijebuman
date Nov 14, 2006 6:16 PM
subject FELLOW NIGERIANS

Fellow contrymen and women,i write to remind you of the fact that we are moving towards a new dispensation where we have to take into consideration the future of our children.
Yes,i agree that the incubent president,Rtd.Chief Olushegun Obasanjo has done a yeomans`s job in the last 7-8 years of his leadership and since he is getting ready to leave,we should not be greedily partisan and selfish to know that God has made IBB to be alife today to come and savour and complemement the good works of the incubent.
I am neither a politician or am i expecting to be but because of my patriotic nature and love for my country Nigeria,i plead with you all to join hands together to bring back the God sent ´messiah´Rtd General IBRAHIM BADAMOSI BABANGIDA.
I live far away from home but have been monitoring the political trends in my beloved country Nigeria.I am frommthe minority states of Edo(the heartbeat of Nigeia)but very versed with all the political happening in my country.

To you IBB,i want you to believe that the wish of God cannot be thwarted by a group of person or person,no matter what happens.You have been elected from heaven as the next president of Nigeria come 2007 and i advice you to beware of drinking any form of `tea`(Remember Tunde Idiagbon,MKO Abiola and others).
Though,my Bible tells me that he who Goid has ordained for a particular mission must succeeed in that mission and you have been ordained by the almighty God whose powers no foe can stand.
I love you my fellow country men and women and want them to remember that tomorrow might be your turn to rule,if you are qualified.
I will welcome all forms of constructive criticism as this is a part of the system we are operating.
BRAVO IBB,LONG MAY YOU REIGN.I STAND SOLIDLY BEHIND YOU.
Malik Osilama Isabemoh.
Barcelona Spain.
joolowo@yahoo.ie
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unfortunately i don't respond to trolls but hopefully some viagra, penile enlargement or 419 spammer will pick up his email address here and send him a truckload of spam..

Labels: junior

Jr is growing so fast its hard to keep up, hard to imagine that he is a little over 2 months old.
Its not easy interacting with a baby at this stage, the interaction is usually one-way, as they don't really respond apart from crying.
But it’s amazing what you learn about them from the few clues they provide. For instance he hates his Moses basket and has stopped sleeping in it (shame we can't send it back to mothercare). He loves, correction; demands attention (typical Leo) and he 'prefers' that you walk around when you carry him in your arms. (you are not allowed to sit down and do anything else).
Failure to adhere to the above instructions will result in a loud noise that may result in the council issuing a noise abatement order…

But I digress...
And then the other day it happened, he responded, our little boy started smiling and its the most beautiful smile i've ever seen…

Labels: junior

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose By any other word would smell as sweet."
The famous line from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet.

Shakespeare may have felt that a name had no importance and that a rose would still smell the same regardless of what it is called, but the Yorubas obviously don't see it that way.
A name is seen as a celebration and an indication of who we are, hence the Yoruba saying "Oruko lonro ni" (which means names affect behavior)

Don't mess with the Yorubas when it comes to names, thats why our names are littered with Ade, Oluwa, Ayo, Ola, Akin, Baba etc. The name given to a child is supposed to signify the destiny of the child (yeah destiny that's another thing the Yorubas don't mess with)

The importance placed on names is a part of our culture that i hold dearly. Prior to the birth of jr, we had debated over possible names to give him. My wife been of the pentecostal leaning had wanted a name from the bible, me of the African leaning said No. I told her point blank no child of mine is going to have any foreign name, that the name is from the bible is completely irrelevant, the bottom line is, it is not a Yoruba name.
Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with names from the bible (to each his own) i just feel we need to protect our culture by ensuring our children have yoruba names, it is even more important when you live outside Nigeria as it may be the only connection the next generation has to our culture.

Anyway the naming ceremony was about 2 weeks ago and i'm happy to say the names (all yoruba) we chose truly reflects the way we feel about our son.

Labels: junior

I'm gradually getting used to the sleepless nights since junior arrived home. Its been pretty exhausting but kudos to the wife as she is bearing the full brunt of junior's antics at night.
We've been told it's a phase and in a couple of weeks he'll adjust to sleeping through the night. (I can't wait)

Its still a strange feeling knowing there's an individual out there with my genes. I'm gradually bonding with him, its easier for the wife i suppose he sees her as his only source of nourishment so they're pretty much glued together.

I was the first person he saw when he opened his eyes. He was handed over to me the night he was born by one of the midwives (while the wife was heavily sedated) and she said something along the lines of 'congratulations here's your son'. I was surprised that i didn't really feel anything, it was like someone introducing me to a complete stranger. However by the next day i was in full fatherhood mode, i suspect it took a full night's sleep for my brain to fully understand the implications of what happened the night before..

so 2 weeks later i'm still coming to grips with life as a dad while junior is changing and growing by the day, the other day my mum said he looked just like me, which is kind of strange considering he seemed to look like the wife when he was born.
I suppose the jury's still out on who he looks like


"It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was." - Anne Sexton
for my dad (aug 16 1938 - apr 19 2004)

Labels: junior

Labels: junior

My life is about to change (big time!!!) yep its going to be scary and exciting at the same time and my life is never going to be the same again.
I'm going to be a father sometime in july (or whenever the little sprog decides to show up). As the day gradually approaches the panic is becoming apparent.

Mrs Ijebuman seems to be coping fine despite the fact that she'll be doing most of the work, while yours truly still can't believe that in a couple of weeks i will be a dad.
I've been reading a book called 'he's having a baby' by Jack O'Sullivan and it has gone a long way in allaying my fears about how totally unprepared i am to face fatherhood.

But many questions still linger, will i bond with this baby? will i be a good father or be a typical naija dad who is only interested in the child's education and nothing else..

and then the financial costs oh dear...

Labels: junior